New Year, Same me?

The start of a New Year always ignites an overwhelming amount of “New Year, New You” campaigns everywhere you look, hey I’m a fitness industry girl, I’ve even helped write plenty of these myself over the past decade.

But this year, I’m suggesting a different approach.

In a society where we are constantly striving, driving, trying- ‘trying to be good’, ‘trying to diet’, ‘trying to not lose my temper’- the idea of a ‘new you’ can sound really enticing and starting the year ‘fresh’ with these goals is an exciting bandwagon to jump on.

However, it is common knowledge that our ambitious ‘New Year’s Resolutions’ tend to lose their sparkle around about February, and why is this?

Well, often the reason you are striving, driving and trying so hard is because you are in fact not being ‘You’ to start with! So being another ‘New’ version of ‘not you’ is even harder work! I can feel the pressure now.

The beautiful thing is;

It is not hard work to be ‘You’

It happens without you doing anything,

You are actually YOU!

(Excuse the simplicity)

It only becomes a challenge when we are ‘trying’ to be what we think we need to be

Thinner, curvier, happier, more outgoing, less outgoing, smarter, prettier, more organised, super mum, less feisty, the list goes on.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am all for embarking on a new exercise or health program and I am all for healthy eating and living and why not at the start of the year, there is no time better than now.

But let’s take some pressure off, let’s watch what we are saying to ourselves, let’s embrace who it is we naturally are and then let’s be in love with that before we start ‘trying’ to edit ourselves.

When you let yourself be who you naturally are, life just flows.

“Make choices because you LOVE your body, not because you hate it.”

Not sure where to start? Kinesiology and Mind Body Medicine can help you ‘reset’ your self-belief and there is definitely no better time to do that, than right now.

Avoid Wedding Overwhelm?

Avoid Wedding Overwhelm?Pupovac-1103

Impossible! Weddings are stressful! Well I’m here to tell you that they don’t have to be.

You can have the day of your dreams drama-free.

Now I can proudly announce that I managed to survive 18months of wedding prep without a single bridezilla or “oh my god the flowers are wrong!” moment- and yes I checked with my mother, husband and sister before I typed that (I’ll even get them to comment below to confirm it).

How?

What if I told you that there is ONE key step that gets easily forgotten in amongst all the dress, flower, and guest seating arrangements hype?

Of all the steps in a bride’s lengthy to-do-list, hitting the gym, seeking out a personal trainer or committing to a strict diet seems to be at the top of most wife-to–be lists (over a decade in the fitness industry qualifies me to make that statement)

SO MUCH emphasis gets put onto how you should look on this ultra-important day and I’m not going to lie, I trained my ass off (literally and figuratively), watched what I ate and dosed up on all the skin loving tonics, vitamins and products a girl could swallow in prep for my big day- I mean I was getting married on a tropical island, so being photographed in a bikini with my new hubby was a guarantee!

But what a lot of people may not have seen going on behind the scenes was all the INTERNAL work that I (and my hubby) were doing on ourselves individually.

I wanted to look beautiful, yes, but more importantly I wanted to handle this exciting milestone of our lives and step into the new role of wife and ‘Mrs’ with grace, ease and by being completely present in that divine moment.

The one key step to avoiding wedding overwhelm is;

To work on how you want to feel as much as you focus on how you want to look.

Do you want to feel stressed?

Overwhelmed?

Anxious?

If not, then I strongly recommend you decide how it is you want to feel and then do the INTERNAL work needed to be able to feel this way!

Now yes, our wedding was a small, intimate gathering, and you may argue that planning a ‘big’ wedding is more stressful, but I would say that every wedding, regardless of setting, numbers or scenario has the opportunity for its own overwhelm- leaving people out, people not attending, not to mention that we didn’t even see our venue until the day before, didn’t have a contingency “what if it rains plan” & did I mention we organised the entire wedding via email? I really believe it all comes down to how centred & grounded the couple can remain.

So how can you do this?

See below for my top 5 tips to helping you avoid the wedding overwhelm;

  • REMEMBER WHAT THE POINT OF THE DAY IS

For us, this was the absolute key– right from the get go we told ourselves that if we both arrived at the beach, with the rings & the celebrant there & we ended the day as husband & wife then the day had been a success! Anything else was icing on the cake.

And something really amazing happens when you embrace this mindset, all the other ‘bits & pieces’ become awesome additions, but not the be-all-and-end all of the day. Do this and watch how free your mind feels.

  • TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF YOURSELF!

Stop telling yourself you have to look the best you ever have looked, stop thinking that everything has to go perfectly, will something go differently to plan? Probably! But if you haven’t scrutinised every morsel of detail, chances are you won’t be disappointed as it won’t be different from what you expected!

Instead start waking up every day, look in the mirror & tell yourself you are beautiful (whether you believe it or not, whether it feels silly or not, say it enough & you will start to believe it I promise!)This is the internal work I’m talking about, when someone pays you compliment accept it graciously instead of disagreeing, start seeing yourself as the beautiful woman you are right now. Your Fiancé has proposed to you, as you are right now, knowing how you look right now, already thinking you are beautiful, do you really need to ‘change’ yourself to be bride ready- no!

And something really beautiful happens when you take this pressure of yourself, everything kind of just flows! The more beautiful you tell yourself you are, the more beautiful you start to look, feel and BEHAVE- you start making food choices that someone who loves themselves makes, you start exercising because you want to continue to feel beautiful- it’s amazingly simple and powerful!

Trust me this works.

  • PRACTISE BEING PRESENT

I introduced a meditation practise in the 12months leading up to our big day for two main reasons; firstly to help me avoid the overwhelm and secondly to help me stay ‘present’ on the day.

It’s an emotional day, an easy day to hit the ‘anxiety’ button in your head & I really wanted to be able to stay present, graceful & centred & I wanted to remember the day through all my senses! What I smelt, what I heard, how I felt & it’s really hard to tune into your senses if you’re all up in your head.

Start small, 5mins of quiet breathing daily and build up as you become more confident with the practise. For all the savvy meditation goddesses out there, I’d suggest some mindful meditation- practise eating and really igniting your senses throughout the meal, the more present in an active moment you can be, the more of the day you will be able to feel like this!

  • REMEMBER IT’S YOUR DAY

Regardless on the size or style of your wedding there will come a point where decisions have to be made, make them as a couple, tune into your heart and honour them. (note- this is much easier if you are doing step 3)

Everyone will have opinions, suggestions & “you really have to ______” (fill in the blank).

Thank them for their input & check in with yourself (and hubby-to-be, it’s his day too!) and then make your decision from your heart- not from a place of guilt. Your mum, sister, aunty may have already had their own day to plan and if not they may get their own, or if they don’t that’s their story, this is yours so make decisions that sit right with you. This is about you and your fiancé, you have a right to decide how the day will be true to your wishes.

If this is a challenge for you, I would strongly recommend doing some work with a Kinesiologist to help you address the feelings of guilt, worry, stress, or fear that may arise with this.

  • TRUST THE UINVERSE

Accept that however things pan out, that is just how it was meant to be for you. Are there things I would change if I could? Of course! Having my little brother there is the first thing I think of, but will he always be a big part of my married life, absolutely- so that’s really what mattered to us. (And for those who know me well, would know this was a big step for me)

Our wedding day proved to me that my belief that if I trust ‘what is meant to be, will be’ really is a beautiful way of letting go of control and going with the flow and as a result I felt like we were rewarded for handling things the way we did.

Without really focusing (or stressing) about every little detail, we allowed things to happen as they were meant to and just flow and as a result we were able to be whole-heartedly in the moment and embrace everything with all our senses ignited.

So now that you know my top tips for avoiding wedding overwhelm, I want you to start to think about how you want to feel on the day (and throughout the planning process) and put some steps in place to help you achieve this.

Got some other great tips? Share below to help inspire other Brides-to-be!

Good luck!

Beth

Wedding Day

B and G

Wedding Day

B and G beachWedding table

 

 

 

 

Happily Naked

Do you feel beautiful when you’re naked? Are you happy with your body?

To me, beauty is someone who is confident in their own skin, someone who is happy in their own unique form of beauty, someone who takes care of themselves and respects their body and accepts it just as it is.

There is no ‘one size fits all’ to being beautiful.

EVERYONE deserves to feel beautiful, EVERYONE deserves to see themselves in a positive light.

As the weather continues to warm, with Summer around the corner, the amount of clothes we are wearing become less, and being ‘happy and naked at the same time’ can present an issue for many people.

So what can you do to combat anxiety around this issue?
The answer is LOTS!! But here are my favourite 6;

 A shift in attitude
First and foremost it’s time to get serious about what thoughts are running through your mind each day. Are you kind to yourself, do you speak nicely about your body (and others bodies for that matter?) Pay attention for a day and notice what thoughts, feelings and sentences go through your mind.

Do you tell yourself you are beautiful? Do you appreciate your body for what it does each day?

OR

Do you critisise yourself? Compare yourself? judge yourself? Do you judge others? Do you only allow yourself to see one body type as beautiful? Chances are if you are a harsh critic on yourself, you are very likely also judging others in the same harsh light.
It’s no wonder so many of us suffer from body anxiety with the way we talk to ourselves!
Step 1 is to pay attention to what you say and change these beliefs to a positive one. Otherwise you will never see yourself in a positive light, regardless of any changes you physically make to your body.

 Practise being naked
That’s right, get naked at home! Spending some time each day in your house or room naked can increase your confidence, it’s like anything practise makes perfect and we are creatures of habit, our brain loves familiarity!! So you are helping train your brain into being comfortable with your naked body.

After a shower, throw on a robe or sarong and head to your room or wherever you are comfortable and hang out for a bit in the nude- moisturise, brush your teeth, listen to a song- whatever! Just don’t get dressed for at least 15mins…..
Bonus points if you can look in the mirror and highlight something you love about your body! (Baby steps Beth, baby steps! More on this later)

If that’s a bit much to start with try sleeping naked. There are HEAPS of reasons to sleep in the nude; it helps your body regulate its temperature, it assists with melatonin release (hormones required to help you sleep) to name a couple, besides any obvious benefits it could result in if you share a bed with someone! (Hello increased libido!)

 Move your body
A healthy body is a happy body, regardless of size or shape. Your body wants to move, regular movement benefits your body in so many ways and it doesn’t take long to start to noticing results, especially if you are checking yourself out naked regularly!! (Thank you step 2!) Commit to a regular exercise routine and focus on moving your body because you love it, not hate it.

 Drink that H2O
Dehydration can result in dry, bumpy, lumpy skin. Keeping yourself hydrated assists with skin tone and appearance. If cellulite is a problem, reducing your caffeine intake and increasing your water intake, as well as body brushing, massage and regular movement have all be thought to help reduce the appearance of cellulite.

 Love the Skin you’re in
Your skin is your biggest organ in the body and it’s important to take care of it! Moisturise with gentle, natural products (there is no point eating organic, healthy food only to then smoother yourself in a chemical storm of body lotion).

If you don’t really believe how important this is, step on a garlic clove first thing in the morning and notice how after a little while you can taste it (I’m serious!!) your skin absorbs what it touches so taking care on the products you use is really important.

 See a Kinesiologist or practitioner of your choice
Working with someone to find and remove any limiting self-beliefs that you may have about yourself is one of the most powerful processes you can do, and this can dramatically change the way you view yourself and behave as a result.

So, can you be happily naked this Summer?

Naked

The Moon Goddess

The Moon Goddess
I’d like to tell you a story, it’s about a Goddess named ‘Moon”. Around the time of her 14th Birthday she is given a gift, not just any gift, a special gift from the universe, this gift holds many special powers & signifies all that is feminine in this world. However moon is not sure about this gift, she receives it with uncertainty, some dismay, & confusion. She questions some of the close females around her and they confide that they too, were also bestowed this gift at the same age, they tell her stories of the nuisance that this gift is, the discomfort and inconvenience it brings with it. With horror Moon learns that the gift will return every month for the next many years of her life. Moon feels she has been tricked, as it does not seem like a gift at all?

Over the next ten years or so, as promised every month the gift returns and each time is met with Moon’s intolerance, annoyance, and disgust. The gift grows tired of being treated in such a way that she becomes disheartened herself & takes less pride in presenting herself in a pleasant way. The gift feels angry, rejected and hurt- she thought she was doing the right thing by Moon- perhaps not? Each month Moon continues to greet her gift with annoyance which soon grows into resentment and after not long hatred, because now, as the gift returns each month with a heavy heart she brings with her, all of her pain and discomfort.

By now, Moon has fallen madly in love with a God named Sun and they have decided it is time to have a baby. After many months of ‘trying’ and no success, Moon becomes frustrated and starts to seek help from the wise shaman ‘Earth’ for answers as to what is wrong with her body?

Finally after what feels like a long time, Moon and Sun are blessed with the arrival of their beautiful baby girl.
The years go by and Sun & Moon grow, as does their family and as moon enters her 5th decade she notices that her gift has stopped coming to see her. She feels sad as she never realised all the beauty that the gift signified; her youth, her femininity, her ability to create life. She feels regret for the fact that she never thanked the gift for what it brought her, or never told it how much she appreciated the blessings it bestowed upon her.

As her daughter nears her 14th Birthday, Moon decides to talk to her about the chance of the gift arriving for her. She tells a story of beauty, femininity, promise. She tells her to treasure the moments with this gift, to greet it at every opportunity with love, respect and appreciation. Her daughter becomes excited and assures her mother that she will always remember what a gift it actually is.

The End.

I dedicate this story to my mother, as a thank you for ensuring I was always informed, & aware, for honouring all my questions & for celebrating this experience with me.

In part two of this series, we will explore what is actually a ‘normal’ Moon cycle, question what you should be accepting as part of it & investigate what your thoughts & beliefs are about it. Stay tuned, you are not going to want to miss it!

 

4 Wise Monkeys MBM

Open-Hearted

“Freely expressing or displaying one’s warm and kindly feelings”

I am attracted to warmth and kindness, I am drawn to someone by their energy, that special something about someone that you can’t quite put into words, it’s just a feeling you get from them and I have always been compelled to voice it when I feel it.

My whole life I have always been someone who has no qualms in openly expressing whatever positive feeling, compliment, or kind thought I feel from someone regardless of whether I know them or not (negatives on the other hand have always been my challenge… more on that later).

I am that person who will tell the girl behind the counter that she has beautiful eyes, or a nice smile and even though at times I have been met with an embarrassed or shocked response it has never put me off doing it again. I have always walked away knowing that those words (regardless of how they were received at the time) had an impact, and I know that because when these moments occur I am not thinking, I’m not in my head, I am in my body and speaking completely from my heart.

I have always considered myself to be open- hearted.

One of my truly wise teachers recently said to us “if you are completely present and open hearted with your client you are giving them everything they need in that moment” it was that moment that I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that I was following the right path…..

With many of my clients, we are working to help them speak whatever it is that is in their heart (often starting with finding out what that even is!) and I hope that through this page I can help you to discover and speak what is in yours.

Living from your heart space creates a life of love, passion, sensuality and expression and when we live life in this way it’s very hard not to be happy.

My passion in life is to help people live a passionate, sensual and expressive life, true to their own unique authentic calling.

So join me on this journey, as together we explore life as passionate, sensual, open hearted souls.

Beth